To Where You Are
by ThanatosUpbringing
Summary: A Simple NaruHina, somewhat tragic, sad ending. Now complete.
1. Part I

My first NaruHina, or at least, an attempt at it.  
  
-Naruto's POV-  
  
Eight long years I have been abroad, travelling and seeing the world with Jiraiya-sama, and I would not have undone it if the choice is given.  
  
I have learnt much from being on the road, and I wish to continue learning.  
  
You see, my departure from Konoha is actually a clever ploy of Tsunade to fool the villagers and probably everyone else. Everyone in Konoha, even Kakashi is led to believe that I am dead. For eight long years, these idiots believed I was dead, while I happily wander the world. According to Jiraiya, when the word of my death hits the street, there was a glorious celebration of some sort, as if a great evil had vanished from the surface of the world.  
  
How beautiful it is, to be no longer hated. It is a great freedom, as if a heavy weight had been lifted.  
  
Now, I am returning to Konoha. Eight years ago, I would have been given these stares that pushes the limit of my sanity further, but now, I have grown, taller and hopefully, stronger. Again, it is wonderful to be strong, and I know that true strength comes from within, so within myself, I have cultured that drive, let it breed and run wild.  
  
But my happiness of not being hated was short lived, when I received word about a friend, Hyuga Hinata.  
  
-Hinata's POV-  
  
Light, how I wish I could be like you. Clouds, how I wish I could drift away.  
  
But no, but no, for I am cursed with pain.  
  
No longer a ninja, a trait I have given up some eight years ago, after his departure, after his death. Without his existence, I would no longer have anything to prove. Nothing. I do not see genuine need from myself to prove my strength to my parents. No, I did not. All I did was to hopefully catch his attention, but now, I am like a kite without strings, left to the wind, drifting to the gust of fate and destiny.  
  
Over those eight years, I have chosen an escape. No longer I was bound to being a ninja. No, I wasn't anymore. Now, I could freely indulge myself in something I find pleasurable, and something that could serve as a place where I could pour my broken heart, my tattered soul. I am a painter, writer, musician and artist.  
  
These things have became my medium of expression, the ways for me to tell the pain and misery I am left to deal with, alone.  
  
Consciously, I stared out the window and into the ever blue sky, and somehow, I feel sick once more. It is a habit that I now have, to just stare at things without much thought, to admire and envy things in it's natural form.  
  
But my choice had it's implications, and it too has brought me great pain. Pain never comes alone, and it never leaves alone either. My family, or I should call, ex-family, has disowned me. I have ashamed them, I am a humiliation beyond description. Why? Because I chose art, over weapons.  
  
Yet I know that they could never see my view, because I have lost my purpose, a ship caught in a maelstrom, lost aimless at sea. When there is no purpose, I know I would fail. It is just has been my destiny to lose everything that I hold dear, and I know how cruel fate is to me.  
  
Life is never fair, and I know from the loses of mine. When you are an artist, you will observe others in good times, or bad times. But when I examine them thoroughly, I realize they are much happy than I do, because they have not known the pain, they have not known solitude, they have not known the misery of salvaging one's life.  
  
I am like a fallen flower, waiting for time to turn it to dust.  
  
-Naruto's POV-  
  
There she was, and she could not see me.  
  
What I have heard saddened me greatly, because she had sunk into isolation and depression. Yet, over the past eight years, she had grown into a beautiful young lady, one that would have garnered many suitors, if not for the sadness the seems to hang on her face. Her eyes seemed devoid of life, even from afar, and from the way I see it, it is life a fireplace, cold after long time of inactivity.  
  
There was this itching feeling inside, to just run up to her, and smack her for letting herself fall to what she is.  
  
Eight years, and I have seen many facets of mankind, it's worst, and perhaps, it's best as well. The manifold identity that humanity could assume, is confusing; but it adds unpredicability into the norm, and for that, it is life. She represent those who have lost everything, something he had seen many, but yet the void in her silver eyes pierced him so deeply, that he barely could resist the urge to cry.  
  
But first, I must know how she is. I could not just barge in and tell her what to do with her life, when I know nothing of her life.  
  
-Omni's POV-  
  
The large shadow cast by the building provided enough cover for Naruto to sneak up close to her, but how would she respond after seeing him? His cerulean eyes scanned the surroundings for cover, and then, his inspiration lit up.  
  
"Henge!" He called quietly in the shadows of the alley, and he came out a different person, a large gauche man.  
  
-Naruto's POV-  
  
Never one to be a stalker, but I consider it a spying mission of some sort, to see how much she, a fine lady that could have been, has deteriorated.  
  
Following her through the thick crowds would have been difficult, but my experience and training as a ninja has made me well versed in the art of tracking and spying. Hinata walked slowly, as if she lacked drive to do anything, as if she was malnourished, but she probably wasn't.  
  
When I heard she was disowned, I fell extremely sad and angry. How on earth could a father disown his own daughter? No matter what evil she has done, she remains as his daughter, and always will. But what would he know, when he had never been a father, no, a leader of an authoritative clan in Konoha.  
  
She continued to walk, carrying the pieces of art she would sell later at the market. I could feel her sorrow, the subdued torment, the misery she kept to herself just by looking at her, and it is indeed discomforting that a girl like her is forced to live with such weights on herself. In a way, she reminded me of myself when I was still 'officially' alive.  
  
Tracking her was easy, but making contact would take some effort.  
  
She sat at her art shop, a small place but packed with many of her works. Even with a short glance, a person could tell out her great talent, and if inspected closely, I could feel her pain, as if all the art had emotions.  
  
Walking closer towards her, my heartbeat rised. It's been a while I have spied, and I have never spied on a friend, so this is....disconcerting at best, dishonorable in another.  
  
"I would like this one, please?" I asked carefully, choosing a small painting of clouds and the sky.  
  
Hinata was quiet for a while, as if lost in her own dream.  
  
"Miss?" I continued.  
  
"Yes. That would be 200 dollars please." She replied, and then she handed over the painting after I gave her the money.  
  
Taking the oppurtunity, I asked, "You look tired, are you okay?"  
  
She smiled, but her smile was forged and forced. "No. I am fine."  
  
"Seriously, you need some rest."  
  
Her body language contradicted her words, "No. I am okay."  
  
"Well, I really hope you are, because I think you look drained of energy... and life." I hoped I would not be misunderstood, I am in my henge form, after all.  
  
"Mister, I am okay." Hinata replied softly, her voice still held her feminine flavor.  
  
IIII  
  
Stop here. Make your own conclusions, this is a one-shot, unless you people review and say otherwise. 


	2. Part II

Disclaimer in my bio.  
  
I would write this to please those of you who wanted another chapter. But I think I should focus on my other fic, so sorry... I suppose. But I will update, very slowly. After all, I need inspiration for character interaction. And if you ask why, I never dated a girl before, so I have no idea what is love or a crush. because I never felt it. But imagination will cure that, HAHAHAHA!!!  
  
-Naruto's POV-  
  
Her voice is like an angel's, a fallen angel. One that has fallen from joy, one that seemed to have lost hope, aim and goal. Like a bird with damaged wings, it is left to die until someone tends to her wound. I would like to be that person, because I am her friend, her comrade, and for the sake of a friend, I would do everything to help her. It has and will always be my way of the ninja.  
  
I took a step away, to leave her be at her shop, but every step I take, cuts my morality, severs my confidence. Is this who I am, one who would leave her be like that?  
  
Walking away, my heart bleeds in pain. Watching such a beautiful lady like her wither, is not the most pleasant sight.  
  
But how will I talk to her, when she seemed devoid of life? I must find the very thing she is fond of... and it would be art. Somehow, I felt that I could communicate with her through art, because isn't that what she is doing?  
  
-Omni-  
  
Naruto walked to the nearby store, and he still held on to his high-level henge. Searching through the endless rows of books he came to find what he was looking for, and to himself, he said, "I will learn her language." He quickly took as many books on the subject of art as his hands could carry, and walked towards the counter to pay for it.  
  
Then, he looked at a friend who passed by, Shikamaru. No, he would not recognize him, and he could not go up to say hi. It is painful to suffer such fates, but as Tsunade said the moment after the plan was initiated, "You cannot reveal yourself. I know it is selfish, because you would no longer be allowed to reveal yourself to them as Naruto. But you can become their guardian angel, protecting them from harm without them knowing it. You can still talk to them, as long as you remain in your henge, and they have not the slightest clue of your true identity."  
  
"It is cruel. Yes it is. But it is to prevent many things from happening, and I with a heavy heart, will have to force you to do so."  
  
Naruto smiled at Shikamaru, and he did not take notice, busy with his own things that be. 'Tsunade-sama. I don't mind, so long as I can protect them. I will bear the pain, to see joy on their faces. Now... about Hinata...' He quickly carried his books back to his new home, a well-kept apartment prepared for his convenience, and there he started to read on the books he had purchase a time before.  
  
-Hinata's POV-  
  
These shadows pass me by, everyday. These shadows see nothing, but joy, their eyes are distorted and so it is their heart. But I paint them, and somehow I know I wish to be like them, I want to be happy.  
  
Alas I am not allowed for happiness, and the more I try to seek it, the farther away it goes. It is a goal that I have chosen to give up, it is a goal impossible to achieve, for me. Yet I wield my brush, pencil and pen, to capture their happiness and joy, with the hopes that some of that happiness will rub off on me.  
  
They pass me by, everyday. They know nothing of the pain I have went through, and somehow, I am happy for them. I draw them, I paint them, but what am I but a thief of the happiness of others?  
  
How I wish for at least a little of their joy, and perhaps that might be another reason why I took up painting. To capture emotion, for myself.  
  
I am selfish, ain't I?  
  
-Naruto's POV-  
  
The light that filters through the window welcomes life, and chases away the darkness. It too helps with the task at hand, to read on art and the judgement of it, which I hope to soon apply when attempting to communicate with Hinata again.  
  
But I know I am lying in a sense, but I hope to help her, using my new identity. I am no longer Naruto, at least no physically, because of the henge that now protects me, and now I go by the name of Ikazuchi Akagi. A new name that I have grown fond of, because it is a clean slate from which I can start anew.  
  
Scanning the pages and digesting as much as I could, I soon realized that this will take me too long to understand fully. But I have to help her, wouldn't I?  
  
Taking my jacket, and my money of course, I seek to hit the uptown areas, and converse with artists at those places, and with some luck, they would provide me with what I need, but before that, I want to take another glance at her, to assure that she would be okay.  
  
-Hinata's POV-  
  
The sky is dark, and gloomy, and so it warns of the coming rain which I love so much.  
  
Rain has been the personification of my sorrow, the drops of rain represents the crying that I have hid away, the darkness tells of a different kind of death, a death that I have seen little, but felt so much. Rain, oh rain, come and wash away my pain. How I wish the rain could so...  
  
Again, I take up my brush, and my palette of colors that I have prepared well. This is my life, that of a rotting scum, that of a withering corpse, and whenever I see the mirror, I am reminded of pain.  
  
Slowly I paint the rain, and often the passersby come to witness me paint, before continuing on their own journeys. Yet, when I see them walk away, I felt left behind. They have a destination, I don't... I don't.  
  
-Naruto's POV-  
  
There she is, painting on a blank canvas. A blank canvas, something I wished to be long ago, a white sheet unstained and unpunished by hatred and blood.  
  
Her hand is fluid, graceful, and it is well reflected on her painting. But every now and then, she steals a glance at those who leave after watching her, and somehow, I could see pain and sorrow. Those eyes I have seen somewhere, those eyes belonged to them who feel left behind and isolated.  
  
Again, I wished I could walk to her, and convince her that she is not left behind.  
  
Everyone else left, and I was the only one left watching her paint the rain outside sheltered market square. Instantly, I knew this would be a good oppurtunity to speak to her, but I also know how rude it is to interrupt someone at work, and so I leave her alone, give her the respect an artist deserve.  
  
Yet I kept on watching, when a part of me felt I should resume my journey. My eyes were deeply captivated by the inversed joy in her artwork, the sorrow that almost seems happy, the pain that feels like pleasure. Is this who she is, because a person once said to me, that a person's work, reflects the person's personality. Is she someone who hides away all the pain with happiness, like me?  
  
III  
  
There, I'm done with the second installment. But it will be a while before I update, because I have other commitments in writing. Of course, reviews are always welcome, because they accelerate my writing. 


	3. Part III

Time Shifter, since you are so intent on getting an answer, I will give you one. He won't be revealing himself very soon. He can't, because he wants to keep his state. I personally think he also wants to forget the hatred, and by revealing himself, it would only remind him of the hatred that he once harbored. As for TomokiG, I thank you for your criticism, but I think Hinata has high intrapersonal intelligence, and she assumes that she has lost it all. Remember, it is only her assumptions of her current state. She is lost and aimless, but not depressed. (i think, cos I dunno how it feels to be depressed)  
  
Actually, I don't like to answer questions, cos it breaks up the tempo of the story, so sorry... HAHA..  
  
III  
  
Naruto's POV  
  
Taking a step closer to the workshop which belongs to one of the better known artists in Konoha, I feel hopeful, wishing that this artist will soon give me some hints on art and criticisms of Hinata's work, and perhaps in the process, discover something about her. It is an oath I have taken to myself, to restore a person back to where she belongs... amongst society.  
  
The door creaks open, and my eyes saw a dusty workshop, with light softly flying through windows in a ray of gold and yellow, and it slowly caresses the old man's skin and flesh, who is well seated on the chairs, surrounded by many paintings. With great ease I could tell the old man's passion for an art not well appreciated in the world, but I have learnt to admire this form of escape, a noble profession aimed at bringing joy to the people, a place where others can escape, and fantasize of utopian worlds.  
  
My eyes worked fast, taking in as many pictures into my mind as I could, and from them, I attempt to complete a puzzle of this old man who is known for paintings which seems to dream of a better world. And for the same reason, I have selected him to give me insight on my fair friend, Hinata. His works, as I could sum up, is those of the optimist, who believes the future will be better, and it will bring hopes and dreams to life. But the greatest pain that could be inflicted to such optimists, is when the dream is broken.  
  
I walked close to him, and I greeted him as a visitor should. His aged, wrinkled skin gave the sheen of experience beyond mine, and his eyes was always hopeful. Such eyes, I wished somehow Hinata could have.  
  
"So, what brings you here, young man?" He said simply, a voice that mirrors the age.  
  
"I want you to help me with a friend."  
  
"I am no psychiatrist."  
  
Handing over the picture of the sky I have bought, I quickly continued, "I want to know what you think of her emotions at the time of painting this work, if you don't mind."  
  
"Ah, I see. You want me to see her when she paints. Who is she, may I ask?"  
  
Staring out through the window, I drew a quick breath, "Hyuga Hinata."  
  
"Very well." The old man stared at the work for some time, silent. But I could see his eyes was wandering throughout the work, trying to understand the work, which I have tried.  
  
Fifteen minutes, and he finally answered me. "Her typical work, but from the way I see it, her skill is very much finely tuned already."  
  
'What?' My thoughts began to speculate theories.  
  
"The same old emptyness in her work, but her skill is better than mine already. Well, there always comes a day when the student exceeds the teacher." He said with a smile, and soon he returned his worn, aged blue eyes to stare at me. "She has always been like this, and from what I could salvage, it was caused by the death of someone she held close to her heart. This picture is not very different, and it seems to me that the blue sky reminded her of some pain."  
  
'Huh? Who might the person be? Shino? Kiba? Or is it someone else?' Instantly, I asked, "Who is this person which she held close?" I could understand the feeling, the torment when someone important was taken away, the misery of feeling vulnerable, the pain of losing, and like ghosts, they can forever haunt and scar a soul.  
  
"No idea." Instantly, my raised hopes were crushed like a bug underfoot, but I quickly came to my senses. He had helped me enough, he had opened a door, a glimmer of oppurtunity and hope in the far end, and that alone, is enough for me.  
  
Realizing this old man have nothing more to say, I quickly said conveyed my gratitude, and took to the door.  
  
IIIIIIII  
  
There she is once again, and under the hot sun, she seemed to hold that distant look in her white eyes once more. Walking close to her, I attempt to strike a conversation again, with the hopes that I could revive some cheer into her. Yet with the emptyness of her eyes, it seems to me that whatever I could ever attempt, will be devoured by the void and nothingness.  
  
So, it pains me to see her, an angel stained in blood, robbed of her valuable wings.  
  
I knew I could not leave her there to wither, no, I could not let someone I know feel pain.  
  
"Hello."  
  
She glanced at me, then she replied weakly, "Hello. What can I do for you, sir?" But I could tell her words was half hearted, perhaps memorized and practiced.  
  
'Shit! What should I talk about...' Quick thinking brought me to a beautiful and also abstract work of the streets of Konoha, "I like that one. But tell me, what is it about?"  
  
She forced a small smile, but even so, it was beautiful in the backdrop of her beautiful but unkept skin, and enough to capture the heart and dreams of a man. "It's about... about... the streets." She seemed lost for a moment, but she regained her composure quickly, "The streets are very... lifeless. Everyone comes and goes, and nothing is permanent. So... The people I paint in the picture are blurred and faceless."  
  
Her intellect has not faded, and I am glad. At least the abyss is not as deep as I thought it was, and returning my concentration to the painting, I quickly notice the immense shades of grey and black, "Why is it very... grey?"  
  
Hinata, walked close, and somehow, I shivered. "It is that way, because that is how things are. Caught in an endless shade of grey, chained by both fate and human nature."  
  
I stared into her white eyes, reminded of the pain that I have went through over the years, in a land which I do not belong, exiled and unwanted in a place I know nothiing of. Her eyes gave her off, the emptyness, the self imposed exile, the sorrow. How I wish, there exists an elixir to cure all these pain, a panacea to forget all, and if it did, I would venture to the ends of the world for it.  
  
"So, what is your opinion of people?" I asked, trying to keep her attention.  
  
Her eyes quietly observed and inspected me, then slowly walked towards the counter. "I... don't think people are aware of certain things that they should."  
  
IIIIIII  
  
Naruto's POV all along. Anyway, if u like, then review. But I personally did not like this chapter. It had not much movement of plot... I think. 


	4. Part IV

-Naruto's POV-  
  
Looking out the window, I see rain. The monsoon season is coming, and Leaf prepares to face an onslaught from nature. The rain falls on the streets, splashing and pooling together; the rain falls on the roofs, and from there it came down to the land below; the rain falls on the flowers and trees, and they rejoice in rejuvenation, a moment of escape from the heat; the raindrops fall on shops, and the shopkeepers fume in anger, knowing less customers will walk through their doors.  
  
I took my time absorbing the knowledge that hides within the books, while humming to the soft music in the background, the endless tick and tack of the raindrops.  
  
Now, I would need to consider the next part of my plan, to get to know her better, and closer. I am rather ashamed to admit that I was never close to her back then, but perhaps she hates me like the rest of them. Who knows, but it is now the past, because I am a new person, and with my new identity, I will pull her out.  
  
What can I do? I remembered her teacher's words, about the one person who had caused her fall and decline. I will find out who he or she is, and I will do it by talking to her, directly.  
  
(scene change, central square, near hinata's art shop)  
  
The square is quite packed, amidst the howling rain and the roaring wind, and there she is once again, unenergetic and pale, yet still she forces herself to talk to her customers.  
  
Making my way closer while weaving through the crowds, I kept my eyes on her, observing and monitoring.  
  
-Hinata's POV-  
  
This is the only thing in my life that makes me feel at least slightly alive, and I wish to keep it that way. Art, has always been the place I could find warmth and comfort, the place where I could vent my frustration, the place where I could pour all my heart out, all into a single picture, poem, short story or song.  
  
These are my mediums, my words, my thoughts, and I am most upset when I see these people view these pictures as mere pictures, not a story, not a tale, not an idea.  
  
Shallow. They are and always will.  
  
Turning my body to look at the newly entered customer, I am more than surprised. 'Who is this person... He came a few times already... I never even asked his name...'  
  
It is undoubtably my mistake, but I have not really devoted myself into socializing with people.  
  
He came, and he kept looking at a work I made some time ago. My observations over time has become very sharp, an artist's instinct, a painter's eye, a poet's intuition, and so I could there the depth in his eyes, as he scans the paint. Somehow, I felt very uncomfortable and nervous... Who is this? An art critic? His eyes never seem to leave the paint, as if he was mesmerized by it... no... although I gave all into painting, I have never seen anyone seem so... captured by the work. Again, I had wanted someone to see my pictures differently, not as a mere decoration to a home, and here, this person seems to offer it, and yet... I am scared and nervous.  
  
But I am happy in my work, and I take pride and full responsibility for them.  
  
I walked next to him, and I mustered all the courage I had to ask.  
  
"What can I do for you, sir?" Born in the Hyuga family had at least gave me the gift of manner, and although I am no longer one of them, I still hold on to this manner that is so important for my only lifeline.  
  
He kept staring at the work, as if he did not listen to me. I am upset because he did not seem to listen, and also happy that someone actually look at art so deeply.  
  
"Sir, can I help you?" I asked again, and this time, he actually snapped out of it.  
  
"Oh... Sorry. Didn't notice you. I like the painting, and if I am right, the whole paint goes clockwise, right? From birth to death... Quite an interesting idea to take."  
  
I gave a slight smile, and I took a look at my own painting. It was a painting, no.. more of an experiment, a style very often used in the past, where a picture tells of the movement of time, and the events along them. It is a story without words, only the brushes, strokes and style of approach to convey the story. "Thank you."  
  
"Anyway, this paint seems to tell about the life of a certain child." He pointed it to a child who sports blue eyes. "Who is he?"  
  
"What makes you think the child is someone I know?" I asked, but I was rather surprised by his added question.  
  
"To truly understand a painting, a person must first understand the painter, and the painter's environment. I assume this is someone you know."  
  
---Naruto's POV---  
  
When I finished my statement, she gave a small chuckle that seemed genuine. She laughed, and to me, it was the laughter of the heavens, the signal that I am drawing closer to my aim.  
  
"Who is he? I don't see any bad in telling you, because he is dead anyhow."  
  
I was nervous, and somehow, sad that the one she cared for is dead.  
  
"He is the person who I loved with all that I had."  
  
I could not stand her delaying of the name, so I could beat and thrash that person up.  
  
"I loved him, but after his death.. I began to hate him. For taking it all away, he took my life, my soul away." Her eyes were sad, hateful and tormented. "I wished I could die as well, but I believe in upholding his memory when nobody would."  
  
Come on, Hinata. Just get to the name!!!  
  
"I hate him. I hate him and I hate him! Yet hate dissipateed as time progressed, and now, I only feel a sense of longing for him."  
  
Who? Now, she is making me anxious. But wait, maybe she did not intend to tell me who he is.  
  
"He is.... "  
  
---IIII  
  
HAHAAHAHA. I intend to finish this story quickly, so maybe there is only one or two more chapters, unless I get a stroke of inspiration. 


	5. Part V

Naruto's POV  
  
I await her words, and yet every moment she delays saying it, it feels like I am being chained tighter and tighter...  
  
"He is..." She said, her eyes seemed hopeful, one loved and then lost. "Naruto."  
  
'What the...' My heart pounded heavily, and I quickly found breathing incredibly difficult. Every cell on my body ached, and a strong jolt of ice cold thunder ran through my sense.  
  
Staring at her beautiful eyes, I am speechless. What in the nine hells have I done to her? By the heavens, if this is punishment, it hurts badly. I swore to help all whom I care for, and yet, I had hurt her so deeply, that she now... a unenergetic shadow of a soul. This is a pure contradiction to whatever ideals I have made... Had I not left, she would not have felt so much pain...  
  
She's a beauty in many ways, yet scarred by a deep wound that muted the beauty. I inflicted that... wound.  
  
What now? What...  
  
"... Are you... happy now?" I asked, hoping that the wound is not deep, but I knew it was a hope that would never be. From the void in her eyes, and the drained voice of hers, I already knew the wound is deep.  
  
She seemed ridiculed, but she answered, "No."  
  
What can I do? Reveal myself?  
  
"If someone told you he is not dead, what... what would you do, now?  
  
Her eyes were shocked, "Are you saying he is... alive?"  
  
Her intelligence was not crushed by my absence, and her quick reply proved it. Now, I am the one in need of help, as this is a wound I have never seen. All the while, the wound was inflicted by another, not me. This... This is... perplexing.  
  
"No. I am saying that IF..."  
  
The light in her eyes dimmed, "I have not thought that far. A person's death cannot be reversed, even the great medic nin, Tsunade could not."  
  
The wind howled, crawling into every corner before continuing, and it swept garbage and papers into the air. Then, it rained.  
  
Seeing rain, and Hinata in such misery is enough reason for me to cry, yet I could not cry, because I have commited a crime. A crime I done unconsciously. A sin committed by my absence... It felt like a dead end to me, and perhaps for her, too. Why is it that not everyone could be helped? Why?  
  
"If he is alive... what would you do?"  
  
"It is pointless to ponder your question, as it would only deceive myself with false hopes, and hurt my heart by knowing it could not be true." Her words were true in her logic, yet here I am, in front of her.  
  
"Please, tell me."  
  
"I do not want to cut myself. So, I will not answer."  
  
I could stand it no longer, "Fine. The truth. He is alive. Naruto is alive... The godaime faked his death to throw Akatsuki off Naruto's tail, so he can avoid both danger, and the hatred the villagers gave to him..." My words were forced out by collecting whatsoever experience I had during covert operations, and thus, I am still pained.  
  
She took two steps back, and fell to the floor.  
  
"What in the world..."  
  
"But please, keep it to yourself. It is a secret known only to myself, Naruto, Jiraiya and Tsunade. No other." Yet, my heart is bleeding. I could not let myself go from this sin, one of the greatest sins ever, to take away the future of a lady, a fair maiden who could obtain the world should she wish.  
  
She was confused, as I could tell from her unbalanced breathing. "... All the while... All.. Is a lie?" Then, she collapsed to the floor.  
  
This sin of mine, can never be washed away. This sin of mine, will forever mark my humanity, the evidence of my weakness. This sin of mine, is the sign of my destiny of misery. This sin of mine, seals my fate as bearer of a plague.  
  
I would be better of dead, wouldn't I? The rain cries for her, her broken heart, her empty soul, her and her life.  
  
We both deserve better. She deserves the world, and I deserve a better life.  
  
This world, is no place for two people like us. She is too perfect for the world, while I am too evil for it. We both, should die. So she could realize the height of her potential, while the world, will be rid of a bearer of evil, like me.  
  
We should die.  
  
IIII  
  
I began this story, with the hopes of writing a romantic tale between Naruto and Hinata, but it seems it... changed from the start. There might be a next chapter though, only if I can find that damned inspiration...  
  
Sorry people, if u wanted a true fluff, and sorry people, because it is a sad ending. (assuming I have no inspiration to continue it), sorry people, cos I found there is no romance in the tale... So, I must change the summary.  
  
Anyway, submit any ideas that might serve as a trigger to the dormant inspiration inside. (again, assuming you people want it to be continued, but I don't like to follow tried and proven true plots... I like something... unique.) 


	6. Part VI

Yay. I love the rain. A rainy day inside my home gave me inspiration, and it will reveal itself in the next chapter. Trust me, it's quite stupid, but I like it.  
  
VI  
  
Naruto's pov  
  
We should die.  
  
No. I should. She doesn't, but before I do, at least I have to explain it to her.  
  
Slowly, I carried her into the restroom behind her shop, my eyes locked on her unconscious but nevertheless, attractive figure. White as snow, and in a way, her skin evokes the sorrow and gloom of one of those days I have had in snow. It was at snow, that I almost lost a friend.  
  
I placed her on a small, simple bed, and sat next to her. I really did not know how to tell her what I meant to say, and seeing her sleep brings out memories that I am weak, and my abilities are limited. As it rains outside, my heart follows down the river of pain and sorrow. Her dark long hair reminded me of so many people, from Tsunami back in wave, to a little orphan girl in Cloud. All of them have seen bad things, and so did she, but why and how was it me that fired the bullet?  
  
The room was simple, the walls was somewhat dirty, and the floors showed signs of age and wanted wear. The small yellowish light, a glow similar to those of wax candles for dinner, and they always invite emotions. Now, the fault is mine own, and I felt ripped and tormented like I never felt before. No hateful stares of the past could rival this self-inflicted pain...  
  
Run? I can't believe I am thinking to that. But it feels like a dead end, with death being the only choice.  
  
She moved slightly, and somehow, I felt it is now or never.  
  
Hinata's pov  
  
Was that a dream after a long nightmare? To be told that he is still alive after so long? Somehow, I felt this was all a trick my desperate mind was playing on myself, yet a part of me felt otherwise.  
  
I turned slightly, and found myself entirely weak, with almost no ability to move. There a person stood, a person I do not recognize, yet awfully familiar. He was blonde, and he had blue eyes, yet he did not see me. He was looking at the ceiling, and I too found myself looking at the ceiling.  
  
Icarus. Slain for flying too close to the sun, and in a way, it did reflect how Naruto was. The ceiling was a wall that limited us, bound us to our fickle existence, and the unwritten social laws that forever affects us. Now, he is gone, yet with such news, I wonder whether this is real to begin with... The lines between reality, and dream, is getting fuzzy for me with each passing day. A curse of those involved in arts, to be immersed in another world that should not exist.  
  
"Hinata." This someone said, and my eyes looked at him. He was distant from the sight of his captivating blue eyes, as if he was reflective on the past.  
  
"I do not know how to tell you, and even if I did, you aren't awake to listen to me..."  
  
He remained quiet, and he looked out into the rain, unaware of my consciousness.  
  
"But it's better that way. At least you can keep hoping and thinking you will meet me again one day."  
  
Slowly, I saw a small drop of tear fall onto the dirty unclean panels on the floor.  
  
"That day, when I left Konoha, it was because I have to. I did not want all of you to suffer, from whatever that might happen should Akatsuki manage to get to Kyubi that is sealed inside me."  
  
'What... No... Naruto?'  
  
"I had to, for everyone. But if I knew what would happen to you..." Another small teardrop fell to the floor. "I would have stayed. I did not want you to be like this."  
  
He stood up, and walked towards the window. There, he kept looking at rain outside, that seemed to reflect on the sorrow that hangs and stalks in the room. Helpless, I felt like crying, yet my body betrayed me once again.  
  
"I never knew... I never knew. I was so stupid. Ain't I? I did not know you liked me, and I was on thinking almost everyone hated me. Yet, you liked me. Again, curse my stupidity and ignorance."  
  
'It wasn't your fault... I never had the courage to speak up...' I felt incredibly weak mentally.  
  
"It is my own stupid actions, that caused you to be like this. My fault. I wish you had fallen for someone else... Because you are too good, too perfect. You deserve.... better. I should die, shouldn't I?"  
  
'NO!' I wanted to speak, yet my mouth betrayed me.  
  
"Yeah. I should. I caused you to be like this... I robbed you of your future."  
  
'No...'  
  
"I will die, as I should, as history state. But I hope you can live on, with renewed confidence, with some purpose."  
  
'No... Wait... Stop...'  
  
"I don't want you to rot, to vanish. I want you to fulfill your own potential, to realize your dreams and help those who need them."  
  
'No... Naruto... You are my... dream.'  
  
"Lastly, my dear friend."  
  
'Why? Why could I not stop him? Why... am I so weak? Am I going to let my dream slip away... again?'  
  
"Hinata... I am sorry."  
  
'No... Stop this nightmare... please, somebody wake me up...'  
  
"I am sorry for what I have done. Although I know you can't hear me, but at least it eases some of my guilt."  
  
'Enough.. This isn't a dream anymore. Stop... Stop! This is a nightmare... Worst of the worst...'  
  
"Goodbye, and this is the end for me."  
  
'STOP!!!!'  
  
"I will kill myself, somewhere you can never find. So, you can live on, although fueled by false hopes. Live, so we can be happy..."  
  
'Stop!!!' Then, it was pitch black...  
  
Naruto's POV  
  
Goodbye, Hinata. This will be the last time we will meet.  
  
I took another look at the rain outside, then I walked outside, with a black umbrella shielding me from the rain.  
  
It's interesting how I feel now, as if this is a reenactment of a movie with a sad ending. The scene where the main character walks away, deserting his past, leaving the person who cares for him behind. Yet, guilt shackles me to my decision, and my death would also seal away the possibilities of Kyubi running free once more.  
  
Again, like a movie, somehow, there exists this nagging thought it my mind, that a continuation is waiting.  
  
But there aren't any continuation, when the hero dies, isn't it?  
  
Goodbye, Hinata.  
  
III  
  
Konoha's Seaside Park, 17th May.  
  
An unidentified blonde teenager has been found dead, washed on the shore this morning, as reported by a group of patrolling rangers. According to the results recovered from the autopsy department, he drowned to death. Further investigation is currently being executed by the Konoha Police Department to classify and identify the motive of the death.If anyone has any information on this 20 plus blonde and blue-eyed person, please come and report to the station to aid with the investigation.  
  
IIIIIIIIII  
  
SAD END, for a chapter. There are a few more chapters, but IF YOU PEOPLE LIKE SAD ENDINGS, STOP HERE.  
  
NARUTO IS DEAD, but how will I continue? I have a few tricks in my writer's pocket, and they are rather childish... but... I like the ideas I came up with. 


	7. Season II, Part I

WARNING: DON't READ THIS CHAPTER IF YOU LIKE SAD ENDINGS!!!!  
  
IIIII  
  
Naruto's POV  
  
In the depth of slowly sinking, I see my life play out in my mind. There was this deep shade of blue around me, only broken by the momentary ray of light piercing through the sea's water. This is death, then. The end of me, and the end of evil within me. Finally, I will be free of all chains and shackles, free of all pain and joy.  
  
The deep shade got darker and darker, and soon it was pitch black, nothing but darkness, the void of emptyness.  
  
Yet...  
  
As dark as it was, there was a small light somewhere, and intuitively, I reached out to it.  
  
"Naruto." A voice, beautiful and captivating broke the sorrow and self-pity of death.  
  
Franticly, I searched for the voice.  
  
Then, the light expanded like an explosion, removing all taint of black from view, except mine own.  
  
In front of me, I saw a lady of incredible beauty, sat on a throne of some sort of diamonds and gems.  
  
"Hello, Naruto."  
  
"Is this heaven?" I asked, after all, only heaven would have a beauty to greet you.  
  
"It would be."  
  
"So, I am going to heaven?"  
  
"...Yes, and no." She answered, as a pair of cherubs sat next to her.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You will go to heaven, but not now."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"You should go, but I feel you have unfinished business back there."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You have every idea what I am talking of. Hyuga Hinata needs you, besides, I, Aphrodite, won't let a beautiful ending disappear. Not if I can help it."  
  
Clearly, I am dumbfounded by this person's intent.  
  
"I used all the clout I have with the master, to offer you a second chance of sorts."  
  
'Second chance? Where is this leading?'  
  
"You will be Hyuga Hinata's guardian angel."  
  
"WHAT?!" I screamed. I am ashamed of myself as a person, because I have left her, a product of my own guilt. I thought death, would release me of my sin, and yet now... I am forced to face her once more.  
  
"Well. Let me explain your capabilites as a guardian." She spoke, and the cherubs handed her a small book for her to read from. "Only she can see you, and only she can hear what you say, the usual guardian angel stuff. Then, you cannot touch her, which means, if you go close to her, you will pass through her like a ghost. In fact, you can't touch anything, like a ghost. Your powers include, increased chances of winning luck-based games, and many more which you will discover later on. Most importantly, you can control her dreams."  
  
"... Can I just go straight to heaven?" I asked, taking every chance I have to avoid another confrontation of Hinata.  
  
"NO!" She screamed."You will only be allowed to enter heaven, after you complete the required assignment."  
  
"What do you want me to do?"  
  
"... Not telling. It ruins the fun."  
  
"....Grrr."  
  
"Anyway, you should go."  
  
The lights just vanished, and it was a view of endless darkness. But slowly, Konoha's skyline slowly penetrated the darkness.  
  
IIII  
  
HAHAHHAHA, WHat do you think? Again, I do realize this is very different from the previous sad tone I have set, this part on will be more light hearted, and even fluffy... Maybe.  
  
New chapter, with an childishly evil twist, and some help from the greek goddess of love, Aphrodite, (venus, freya ...whatever.) 


	8. Season II, Part II

Lame twist, so what? 

Hinata's POV

A dream, a place where I would escape. A picture, a new world to be immersed in. Escape has always been the path I have chosen, and even if I regret it, what has passed, had passed. Yet somehow, in some way, that one dream contantly lingers in my mind. Why? Is it true? Was that not a dream?

A nightmare that slowly sets in, awakening more regret and sorrow. The term 'if' became the deciding factor, the term that always instills regret, instead of enlightenment and understand. If I had spoke to Naruto those years back, would he leave, and get killed by some accident? If... I hate it. The term, the meaning, it makes a person regret. If... The term is a chain, a wall, a barrier that cuts me away. I should look forward, forgive my own undoing, and forget it all. But such moral philosophies could not help me escape, because my own guilt, my own regret. So, be damned, the term of IF, because you are the seed of regret.

Die, all of you. Suffer, the creators of languages long past, for creating the term, 'If.' They who have unleashed the pandora's box of regret and guilt, they who have awakened sorrow and it's cohorts.

IIII

Naruto's POV

A strange feeling, a new way to see the world. Now I am a spirit whom everyone but Hinata could see, now I am something intangible, a ethereal being who's existence is not known. A spirit who could pass through walls ever so easily, feels no need for walls. A unique insight towards ideals and the concept of privacy.

Here I am, returned to the world, yet not wholly returned. This isn't the world I know of, as I could not touch.

The sun lies above the mountains, it's evening gaze offers vision, it's rays of light offers a life to the plants and beings.

Life... ah, the term is somehow arbitrary, yet isn't as well. There she is, once more, lying on the table. Alone in the shop, she watches people pass her, she watches and thus the role of an observer is taken up by her. Now, whether I like it or not, I have to make amends.

So, I approached her slowly, her eyes hovering over the crowds.

Soon, I was next to her, yet she did not seem to notice.

"..." I watch her reactions to the passing crowds.

"Hinata."

In a moment's warning, she turned and quickly asked, "What?" I could sense her hostility, and perhaps she enjoys dreaming, thus did not want to be interrupted. But her eyes swiftly interpreted the situation, and a more polite response came. "...What can I do for you?"

I smiled, "Do I not seem familiar?"

"... You're... you're that person in..."

It feels strange, trying to reach out again after the link was broken so long ago. To rebuild something that crumbled to the erosions of time and fate, and I find myself slightly... sad.

"... the dream..." She reached out to touched me, but it just went through my body, and so, somehow, she fell to the floor. Then, she started to laugh, not a form of cheery laughter, but one that is more sinister, and snide. I found myself speechless and at a loss.

'What is this?'

"...HA.. HA... Ha. So, this is a hallucination. A figment of my soul's desperation and collapsing sanity."

'What?'

"Is this a dream?"

What in the world...

"I'm going nuts, ain't I?"

Oh no. She's slipping...

"The wall between dream and reality seems to have crumbled." She then laughed some more, hysterical. "I can't even tell what is real anymore..."

"No. This is not a dream. It isn't." I answered stern, trying to snap her out, pull her away from the abyss that she seems to slip further into with each passing day.

"Then, why can't I touch you?"

I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to find an answer. Really, at this moment, I wished I never existed at all. Entrusted to guard her, yet my presence kills what I am supposed to guard...

"So, this is a dream. Isn't it?"

"No. It's isn't. You can't touch me because I am a spiritual being. Things that exists in every being, things that some ninjas even learned to wield.

A silence that dwarves the noise of the crowds seem to surround us, like a bubble. But it lasted only for a moment.

"Spirits are real. They exist. That's why you can't touch me." I have encountered spirits of many kind in my vagabond years, but being a spirit myself is... strange. "You used to be a ninja. You should know."

But the use of the term, 'ninja' seemed to only worsen to case. "What has passed, has passed. I'm no longer a ninja."

"So... You're okay?"

Her eyes searched everywhere, scanning every corner for something perhaps of some importance, looking for something I know not. But finally, her eyes returned to mine, and softly she replied, "Yes." Then, a person walked pass me, and then her expressions changed again. "Why didn't he avoid you? This is a trick.. you're pulling a trick again."

"Hinata. Only you can see me, and only you can hear me. No one else, it's a power of mine."

"No... Why?"

"Finally. Back to why I came. I'm your guardian angel from now. I can warn you of things and stuff, but you'd have to handle the rest on your own."

Silence... An assassin that kills life, sometimes. Inside I knew she still doesn't believe in my existence, the fact that remains to her, that I am a mere fabrication of her mind, a hallucination at best, and somehow, I feel a part of that thought is correct. In fact, my doubts are emerging, as problems and questions to add to my own confusion.

'How am I going to help her? Talk? Just by talking, there is not much I could do...'

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

The next update will come when the blood moon rises.


	9. Season II, Part III

Nightfall, and I await her to return to the land of dreams. Here I am, watching the stars, clouds and the iridiscent moon gaze down onto humankind, and they, the celestial creatures that wander the heavens, look at the foolish actions taken by man. I, had made two foolish actions. What they are, the heavens know. 

The street lights glow in a subdued orange, and the streets reflects a retro feel, those that match the feeling of the sun setting. It is flooded with the feeling of anguish, and somehow, the regret of letting an oppurtunity pass me by.

Hinata remains alone inside, but still, I do not want to approach her now. She had asked me to leave her alone, and I will, for now.

Colors have no meaning, but often only our minds associate emotions and thoughts to them. So, each color holds different meaning for everyone. An artist, like Hinata, would know this well. Colors, they are everywhere, and to some people, they are poison to the heart, as everytime a certain color emerges, a memory associated with it flashes before their eyes. It's a painful feeling, being stabbed by colors everywhere.

* * *

By the balcony of my worn down home, I look at the people who wander the streets. Homeless, and unwanted, they remind me of myself, and how fortunate I am to still have a home, still have food on the table. Physically, I would be better off, but these people who wander aimlessly, have a satisfaction that myself, and some others, don't. 

There is always a gap in my soul, my heart. Nightfall, and somehow, I feel neutral. A momentary void of feelings, as I walked out the door, and blend into the crowds. This, is a world I am foreign to. Close in a plane, distant in another. I leave, tonight to obtain some supplies for myself, food and tools for my work.

Momentarily, I stole a glimpse of the people around me as they pass me by, and I felt like I was drowning. People, who have an aim, are worthy of my envy and jealousy. I could sense their drive, their passion as they walked pass, something... that I can only hope to regain. When the fires burn out, only ashes remain.

Ashes, and dust. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Everyday, someone's dream crumbles, in the cruel tide of war, deceit, nature and destiny. To those who hold them close, what is left, is only dust.

So fair is the world, that everyone must lose what they have gained eventually.

Unconsciously, I have arrived at a place, a central square where festivals are often held, and today, is one of those days. People, are everywhere. The air is filled with the energy and life of a festivity, and this is also a way I choose to escape my past. Here, I can soak up some of their energy, some of their joy, some of their life. A parasite's life, to steal others happiness for my own gain. Gatherings like this attracts me, the same way certain insects are attracted to light. Like certain animals, trapping heat when the sun is near, for use when the sun descends into the horizon.

'So... I am really this pitiful...'

The more I try to forget, and live on, the more it comes back to haunt me. Why? Something I hold close was snatched away, and now, it's pain and misery reawakens. Why can't life let me remain alone, let me forget?

* * *

I dared to come and intrude only after I knew she was asleep. To me, this is my oppurtunity, to slip into her dreams, and help her with the only way I can. 

Damn. Why did it always have to be this way?

I gazed at her sleeping form, and I am taken aback by an enchanting smile. Should I intrude on her dreams? A place where happiness is possible, for her. Do I have the right to do so? My hesitation is starting to worry myself, and I am starting to question my options. Is this really my only way to help her? To intrude into her self-made heaven?

Damn the gods for not giving me more options.

* * *

If somebody still reads this, and likes it. I suggest you people thank Lutai for indirectly reminding me that I stil have stories to continue. Deviantart stole my soul. 


	10. Season II, Part IV

A little continuation for the story.

Endless, is this field of yellow flowers, of thousand blooms and of countless golden petals glowing under an unknown light. The horizon seems forever, and the rays of light from the sky above rain down like the offerings of hope. It's a pretty world, covered in the luminescence of hope, constructed for her wishes, built on her hopes. It's a land of dreams, and I have intruded into her solitary sanctuary. It's cruel of me to pry into her dreams, and more tragic of me to have admitted it. What have I become? The monster they say I am?

In this world, she is lonely no more, with her imaginary companions to stay by her side, to offer her their ears as she speaks of her fears and pains, to look after her like a mother she never known, to talk to her like a friend she has lost ages ago. In this land of infinite wishes and dreams, her lost dreams became a reality, and also, here, she becomes one who governs nature, free from the binds of reality that forever is and was.

My footsteps on the flowerbed sends small ripples through the flowers, as if sensing my arrival in this land, and they will soon inform their queen.

'Why are you here?' She stood, in the middle of the fields, her eyes closed and her posture somewhat tense.

There had never been anything for me to lose, isn't it? Only for me to gain. I walked over to her, and my fingers caressed her soft, smooth cheek. 'For you, am I here.'

I had observed, watched and monitored her for weeks, and slowly, I felt the need to walk over and give her a hand. It's not fair, nor is it fair for me to just stand silent. Denial and inaction is death in the field of war, and somehow, it is also true here. Every cut she suffers in the tormented lands of society hurts me, like a poison that doesn't kill, but constantly causes jolts of pain and misery, like a hallucinogen awakening the deepest fears of a person repeatedly.

It's not right for her to receive such pain.

"I've tried so hard to banish you from my mind, and right when I was about to succeed, you... return, dead yet not dead."

I sighed inside, not knowing what to say. Something though, propelled me to step closer, and hold her. "My fault. Always has been." I could touch, and I merely looked at her silently, into her eyes. Her eyes, seemed to insult and cast a powerful spell of dismay, of fear, of sorrow. I felt like a fool...

"Why? Why now?" She said, her voice fading.

'What difference if I came later? There wasn't any. She'd only sink deeper into a collapse of emotions, sink into a mere shell of a lady, like the dry skin shed by a snake. "I... couldn't watch you go further like this." I knew what I felt, but I didn't know how to say it. At that time, I wish I could just be like some casanova who could charm a lady with mere words.

She leaned closer, and onto my shoulder. "This is a dream, isn't it?" I couldn't bear to tell her. I couldn't make myself hurt her more. "I... don't want to wake up."

Eventually she has to, and I could only wonder how she'd feel when she wakes up. "I'll be here, everytime you sleep."

"Then, I'll sleep forever." She said, her hands held mine tightly. "I'll join you in death..."

'CRAP! What have I done... I merely wanted her to live more happily, more joyfully. Am I cursed to hurt everyone I love?' I felt like I was crushed and trapped by a rapidly enclosing room, where all it's walls get closer and closer. "No. I need you to live. I want to live."

She looked at me, "Let me choose what I want." She touched my cheek, and then my neck, and she pulled me closer to her. A part of me wanted her to die now, so we may be together...

'NO!' I can't let her die. All this time I've fought to keep my friends alive and happy, is this what I want?

"Please... Don't stop me. I've suffered long enough."

IOIOIIOIOIOOOIIIOOOIII

So, that's how it ends. They both join in death!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

A few more chapters will come later, depends.

Give my other stories a little bit of love and reviews, k? Their quite okay, except the first half of my 68k story(come on, beginners try, can't help it, but the later half is quite okay). 


	11. Finale

One of the unreleased chapters I kept on my com, but never had time to post... It's short as hell, but then...

IIIII

Hinata's POV

Life's like a dream sometimes, a beautiful day can turn into a nightmare in a flicker, and back in a moment's whisper.

Is this real? Or is this an illusion? Does it matter that whether we are both dead or alive? Here, in this world, I could feel him, his warmth, his energy, his personality. It was the shield I've lost for so long, it was the anchor that kept me from drifting away. And I won't let it drift away again.

"Naruto... Don't try to stop me." I said softly, my hands grabbed his illusionary body harder. Even if only here, I could touch him, Even if he is merely a ghost, but right here and now, he was more real than reality was. If death is the price for me to be with the one I love, so be it.

Naruto's POV

Life's like a bad nightmare, full of surprises, full of obstacles, full of unfulfilled dreams.

In my arms, her head on my chest, I could feel her craving, her broken dreams somehow coming back together again. Perhaps for once, I should just let her do as she please. My fingers slowly stroked her soft black hair, and my other held her closer.

"I won't stop you." I don't have the right, to stop her. I don't have a reason for her to live.

They say when you live, you can make a difference. However, it doesn't work all the time.

IIIII

At last, this story. is finished. .

How she dies? Imagine it urself. LOLZ 


End file.
